Anger Dun Gone and Left Me

 

Anger was my best friend  now its done gone and left me  Who am I without it?  Its so empty and lonely  Too much spare time  They say I’m a genius, a scholar,  how could that be?  My days seem longer since  anger left me.  So foreign to me  with no one left to hate  No need to pretend  pexels-photo-415380.jpeg

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Too Big for Comfort

 

“I don’t have a problem, I can stop anytime I want…,“ my self–preserving ego swears.  Only, I just keep coming back.  Getting that insatiable out of this world high eludes me.  “Psst, its me, your best friend, I can take away all your fears, doubts, heighten your sense of worthiness and importance.   Besides, you’re much more fun when you play with me,” comforts my secret pal.  “No one is more faithful to you than me.”I’m okay…

Too Big

Catching Up With Myself

When I was young, vibrant and all-knowing, nobody told me about the part where glimpses of instant recall would appear without warning 40, 50, and even 60 years later.  Flashes of my impatience with those slow walking old people scurrying across the street trying to make it to the other side before the light changed to red.  Nobody told me that I would have first-hand knowledge of my refusal to speed up or move out of the way of people rushing here and there.  Nobody told me how I would become more thoughtful, kind and considerate.  I thought all old people, accept my grandmother of course, were destined to be mean, grouchy, and lived to make others miserable.  I didn’t know, as a bonus for still living, I’d get wisdom peppered with laughter and joy.   I’d still be a little weird, but fun to be around.  Nobody told me I’d share my rambling gifts and talents on something called Facebook, write a book, or be available to listening to another young, vibrant, all-knowing person.  Thank you to all those wise old people who sprinkled my life with understanding, patience, and joy.  I’m a happy person…

 

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Interrupted Safety Net

pexels-photo-209717.jpegMama always cautioned us kids, “don’t get the big head…Don’t get too big for your britches” That was her way of keeping us safe from pride and ego-driven self-importance.  The only problem with that philosophy was dumbing down your sense of worth became the dominant determiner of who we were.  She came up in an era that you could get killed (mentally, emotionally, and even physically) for being too smart.   Staying in your place was the preferred survival practice.   Interrupting that safety net mentality can dislodge old belief systems that serve as blockages to self-realizations and success you were born to contribute to the world.